Have you ever found yourself trying to have what seems to you a perfectly nice, intimate moment with your man, only for him to spoil it by being difficult and distant and leaving you somewhere between frustration and concern as you wonder why oh why men pull away?
If so, you’re not alone. It’s a generalization, to be sure, but it’s one that has long been present in the mainstream. Authors as wildly different as the hyper-masculine Hemingway and Virginia Woolf and her fellow First Wave Feminism writers have used this trope.
We see it in countless films, with a grim, chisel-jawed hero leaving his wife or girlfriend or fling behind to go play the hero, or else sits at the edge of the bed and refuses to talk about the past with the one person to whom they should dedicate their present.
Trying to figure out why men pull away in relationships is complicated by the fact that—and try and follow us on this oh-so-complicated piece of logic—not all men are the same. For whatever reason, we take issue with stereotyping women, while the contrary is far more apt to be deemed socially acceptable. That’s not a knock against men or women, but a mere observation.
In any case, there are actually a variety of reasons why men pull away in relationships. Here are the top six of them, and what you can do about it