#6: DO NOT Just ‘Put Up With’ It
In fact, Ana knows this. Towards the beginning of the book, as stated, she wonders what all her literary female heroines would do in this situation, and rightly says Elizabeth Bennet wouldn’t put up with Mr. Grey, and—prepare for the shock of reading the following words—Anastasia Steele, you are right.
That’s what’s made Lizzie such a powerful and enduring character for more than two centuries now, the fact that she successfully spars, thrusts and parries with Mr. Darcy and only comes around to and later marries him on her own terms.
That’s part of what adds a touch of spontaneity and rapidity to the relationship, too, the quick back and forths and the fact that the two balance one another. The same may be said of Beatrice and Benedick in Shakespeare’s Much Ado About Nothing, and of course, that classic of cinema, 10 Things I Hate About You (also based on a Shakespeare play.)
Whether you’re looking to engage in Fifty Shades of Grey sex acts or just want an equal relationship, the fact of the matter is, you should never have to just ‘put up with’ someone or something you don’t like—certainly not when they make you cringe and sign a contract.
(Pop quiz, literary aficionados—what literary character is famous for talking people into signing contracts? If you guessed Mephistopheles, agent of Satan and Hell, congratulations—you’re right, and have more literary and common sense than Anastasia Steele!)
Whether you choose to engage in Fifty Shades of Grey sex acts or choose to stick to your own regular routine, suffice it to say that it takes all of the above factors—and then some—to create a sense of balance in any relationship, BDSM or otherwise, and it’s that sense of equality which can lead to a relationship being Fifty Shades of Grey of Fantastic.