#6: The Relationship is Over When Lies Replace Truth, Or Dread Replaces Love
To be fair, lies bound to happen in any relationship, good or bad. Period. That’s just the reality of life. Wilde and Waugh both recognized that.
In fact, it’s little white lies blown way out of proportion which make for the hilarity and sharp witty commentary in Wilde’s three biggest theatrical works, The Importance of Being Earnest, An Ideal Husband, and Lady Windermere’s Fan. (As a quick aside, yet another way to know when a relationship is over is if your partner does blow the little things out of proportion.)
That being said, however, lies should always be the exception, rather than the rule…and there are some lies that are just not acceptable. Remember when we said that if others lit the flame for you instead of your partner?
That’s another way to know when a relationship is over, true, but it’s also an instance wherein honesty is extremely important, lest you leave your ex feeling “burned.” Breaking up and being open and honest about why is one thing…lying to your partner and having an affair behind their back—that’s not just hurtful and often downright cruel but, in practical terms, a great way to ruin your economic standing in a divorce, if that’s a factor.
One last way to know when a relationship is over—if you start to dread the other person’s coming home. This can be as simple as their being a mood-killer or as complicated (and serious) as their being loud and potentially abusive. (In the latter case, LEAVE IMMEDIATELY—don’t blame yourself, and don’t wait…protect yourself, and call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.)
Above all, don’t beat yourself up if and when you know the relationship is over, as while not every story can have a happy ending, this may not be the end of the story for either of you, but simply a fresh chance to live life as friends, and start a new chapter with someone else.
Do you have any other signs on how to know when a relationship is over?